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What’s more, I was pretty sure I’d do it again.
There was no harm in it. She’d never ever find out.
CHAPTER NINE
I was starting to wish my job kept me a little busier.
If I were in constant motion it wouldn’t be so hard to distract myself from the sight of Curtis Mulligan’s muscled arms.
I was pretty sure Curtis knew exactly what he was doing, edging close to the counter and leaning forward while his voice dropped several octaves, oozing sex and confidence. My mistake was letting on that I noticed when he lurched through the door this morning looking sleepless and disreputable, like he’d just spent the last eight hours rolling around in a cathouse.
At least he had no way of knowing what was running through my head when he got close. I was confident in my ability to put on a damn good poker face when I had to. Anyway, I wasn’t truly interested in Curtis. The guy was surly and possibly dangerous and I’d bet my car that he wasn’t too choosy about where he stuck his dick.
However, I couldn’t deny that Curtis Mulligan was also hot as hell. And just because I didn’t especially like talking to him didn’t mean that I could ignore the way he looked. He had nothing in common with the sleek and smooth shaven guys who usually caught my eye. Curtis was all rough edges and raw power. He’d probably never look comfortable in a suit and tie, not even if he shaved, slicked his straw-colored hair back and sustained an immense attitude adjustment.
Strangely enough, my dad seemed to like him. Maybe Curtis reminded him of his youth since they’d come from the same place. Good old crappy Emblem. My dad tended to have a soft spot for anyone who was making an effort to overcome his past. I heard them laughing together down the hall in my dad’s office and I kind of wondered what they were talking about. When I mentioned that Curtis would be glad to clean the Scratch restrooms I was being kind of a bitch but I was annoyed by the way he looked at me, like I was an easy puzzle he’d already solved. It didn’t matter though. Curtis called my bluff on the bathroom bit with a sincere statement about how happy he’d be to clean the muck out of every corner of the building and my dad was charmed.
I wasn’t so charmed. I couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d been trying to mock me. I could be wrong. But Curtis didn’t bring out the best in me and I ought to keep my distance from him. I was still flustered after the confrontation with the detestable Parker Neely. I didn’t need to make any new enemies.
The next time Curtis took a stroll through the lobby en route to the back rooms he kept his head down, which was kind of a relief since our conversations didn’t end up being the high point of my day. Hopefully we’d learn to coexist in the confines of Scratch without our personalities colliding too often.
As soon as Curtis disappeared, a woman around my mom’s age came through the doors. She’d just lost her husband in a car accident and she wanted to get a tattoo depicting the date of their wedding anniversary. They’d been together since high school. They had two teenage daughters. Her husband, Tim, had always dreamed of owning a boat someday.
I didn’t know why she felt like she had to tell me all this but I was glad to listen if she needed to talk. That was something I was actually good at, listening. Sometimes people just needed someone to listen, even just for a few minutes.
As if answering my earlier wish to be busier, the phone rang eight times over the next half hour. Scratch took walk in customers all the time but often people would request a particular artist and that meant an appointment was required.
I was in the middle of trying to navigate the screens in the scheduling system when I became aware that a new customer had entered the building. I looked up, intending to smile a greeting, conveying I would be right with the new customer as soon as I was finished with the one on the phone.
That smile never happened once I saw who had really walked in. And it wasn’t a customer.
“Next Tuesday at three,” I said to the woman on the phone. My voice betrayed nothing of the red rage quickly overcoming me. “We look forward to seeing you then.”
I made sure the call was disconnected before I spoke.
“What the fuck are you doing here?”
Parkey Neely looked pained, nervous. His hands were in shoved in the pockets of his khaki pants and he approached slowly. “I’m so sorry to just barge in here, Cassie. I really wanted to talk to you and I wasn’t sure you’d show up for class again.”
“Screw that,” I sneered. “You think you can drive me out of school again so easily?”
He shook his head. “No, I just-“
“Because I’m not seventeen anymore, you asshole.” I was standing now. “And I’ve got nothing to say to you.”
His expression was miserable. “Please just give me five minutes and I swear you won’t have to see me again.”
“I don’t want to see you now.”
Parker winced. “Look, I’ll even drop that statistics class if it will make you more comfortable.”
“I don’t give a flying fuck what you do, Parker.”
“Cassie?”
That wasn’t Parker’s suave, buttery voice.
Curtis was back. He kept a watchful eye on Parker as he drew closer, his eyes already narrowed with dislike.
“You need me to move this guy out of here?” he said, addressing me while keeping his hardened gaze fastened on Parker. I wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of that gaze. Parker didn’t appear too excited about it either. He backed up a few inches as Curtis closed in.
“I think he was just leaving,” I told Curtis.
Parker gave it one last try. “Five minutes. Please.”
I sniffed. “I don’t owe you that.”
He nodded. “Of course not. You owe me nothing. Please give me the five minutes anyway.”
I shook my head. “I don’t believe this. How’d you know I’d be here?”
“I asked.”
“Asked who?”
“Does it matter?”
“No. But you better get the hell out before my dad finds you. I kind of doubt he’ll be as restrained as Curtis over here.”
Parker glanced at Curtis, who answered with a dead-eyed stare that warned he might be capable of just about anything.
“Okay,” Parker said, backing up a few steps. “I’m heading over to the coffee place a few doors down.”
“Great.” I clapped my hands together. “Please try to trip on the doorstop on your way out.”
Curtis snorted with laughter.
Parker ignored him and continued. “I’ll wait there for an hour in the hopes you’ll give me a chance to apologize properly. I’ve never done that and I need to. But I’ll understand if you don’t show up, Cassie. And I’ll still drop the class.”
I could have shouted to him to get lost or fuck off or any number of things but I didn’t want to call more attention to the situation. If my father came out here and realized that the guy who humiliated his daughter was standing in the lobby there might be fireworks indeed.
Curtis kept his eyes on Parker until he was out the door. Unfortunately, Parker did not lose his balance and trip on the doorstop or anything else.
When Curtis was satisfied that Parker was gone he turned to me. “What the fuck was that?” he asked.
To my dismay I discovered that I was on the verge of crying.
“None of your damn business,” I snapped. I snatched a tissue from the box on the desk and blew my nose.
Curtis wasn’t wounded by my sharpness. “Just asking,” he said, shrugging.
I took a breath. “Sorry. He just…caught me off guard.”
“I can see that,” said Curtis but his voice wasn’t unkind. He was looking at me rather intently now, with a little bit of pity mixed in. Open pity from Curtis Mulligan made me feel even worse.
At least we were alone in the lobby so there wasn’t any additional explaining to do. Any minute now the staff would start heading out to lunch. It was nearly noon.
Curtis was still watching
me as I struggled to contain my emotions.
“Curtis,” I said, “I’d really appreciate it if you wouldn’t mention this to my dad or Uncle Deck or anyone else.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Mention what?”
I managed a smile. “Exactly.”
He glanced toward the door. “Who the hell is that guy anyway?”
I considered how to sum up Parker Neely. “An unsolicited blast from the past.”
“Ah.” Curtis nodded. “I’ve got a few of those.”
“I’m sure you do.”
He shot me a look and I bit my lip, wishing I hadn’t hinted at his criminal history.
“Thank you,” I said. “For having my back here.”
“No problem.” He looked at the door again as if daring Parker to reappear. “You can let me know if he bothers you again. I’ll take care of it.”
I wasn’t sure I wanted to know what Curtis’s version of ‘take care of it’ meant.
“I’m pretty sure just the sight of you will scare him off,” I said with a laugh.
Curtis smiled. He actually had a really nice smile. I had a feeling it didn’t materialize often enough.
“That might be true,” he said. “Except sometimes I scare people without really meaning to.”
He walked away without saying anything else.
I sank down into my chair. I picked up a pen and began clicking it just because having something in my hands made me feel a little less anxious.
Less than a hundred yards away Parker Neely was presumably waiting for me to step through the door of Coffee Hole and offer him absolution. The whole idea made me furious. Did he think it was no big deal to just waltz in here, smile and tell me the he sure was sorry he ruined my life once upon a time? I wasn’t generous enough to forgive him just like that.
And yet…
I hated the hold that terrible time still had over me. I’d allowed it to shape the course of my life and not in a good way. Perhaps I could use the kind of closure that Parker was offering.
If I took too much time to think about it I wouldn’t go.
And if I didn’t go I might regret losing the opportunity to say the things that have been on my mind for years.
A flash of purple hair caught my eye. Freya was emerging from the ladies’ room. She turned when I called her name.
“You have a customer right now?” I asked her.
She shook her head. “Not unless you have someone waiting out here.” She took a look at the empty chairs in the lobby. “Ah, well. Almost lunch hour anyway.”
“You mind handling the reception desk for fifteen minutes?”
“Sure, no problem.”
I stuck my phone in my back pocket and seized my purse from the bottom drawer of the desk before pushing the chair back. “I’ve just got to run a quick errand,” I explained as Freya and I switched places.
Freya made herself comfortable. “Take your time.”
“Thanks.”
My heart was thudding in my chest during the short walk down to the coffee place. I reminded myself I had no reason to be anxious. There were so many times when I’d thought about telling Parker Neely to take the short road to hell and now I had the chance.
He was waiting there, just as he said he’d be. There was a single coffee cup in front of him but he wasn’t touching it. He actually looked a little lonely and pathetic sitting there. Ordinarily that would have delighted me but I was here to close old wounds not rub salt in them.
Parker glanced my way when I opened the door and his eyes widened. He stood up immediately but I took my time at the counter getting a cup of coffee for myself before approaching his table.
“I’m glad you came,” Parker said and he really did look glad.
I sat down across from him and hung my purse on the chair. “Five minutes,” I said.
“Cassie,” he started to say. His elbow was on the table and he moved two fingers to his lips, a thinking pose. I waited.
“What I did to you was indefensible,” he said. “So I’m not here to give you some idiotic excuse about why I did it. But not a day has gone by where I didn’t feel complete remorse. I’m sorry. I’ll regret hurting you forever.” He leaned forward with an earnest expression. “And the biggest hell of it, Cassie? I really liked you. More than I’d ever liked any other girl before. Or since.”
I cupped the mug of coffee in my hands, wanting to hold onto something solid while I struggled to keep my voice even. “I got sick, Parker. The way people treated me, looked at me, I couldn’t deal with it. I left school. I haven’t had a real boyfriend since then. Whenever I go out with a guy now I have to wonder if he’s really what he seems. Or if an evil liar lurks underneath. I hated you. If someone had asked me twenty-four hours ago I would have said that I still hate you. I wouldn’t even have hesitated to say it.”
Parker kept his eyes on the table while I talked. Everything about his posture said my words made him miserable. Even after all this time he deserved that. And he knew it.
“I’m sorry,” he said again, his voice catching. “I’ve thought about you so many times, wondered how you were, wished I had the nerve to go to your house and knock on your door.”
“That wouldn’t have been a good idea,” I said. “Even now, any member of my family would surely be happy to greet you with a baseball bat to the head.”
He flashed a quick smile. Then he grew serious. “At first I never sought you out because I was a coward. And then I thought I had no right to just pop up somewhere in your life.”
“And yet pop up you did.”
He nodded. “Accidentally. I thought I was seeing things when you walked into that room yesterday.”
I squeezed the mug between my palms. The heat from the coffee within was comforting. “What is it you want, Parker? You want me to tell you that I forgive you? You’ll be disappointed. I don’t forgive you.”
He nodded, his expression unsurprised but tired. “I can’t deny I was hoping you’d say something else but I understand. It’s really not my intention to mess with your head. I just wanted the chance to extend the apology I should have given you back then.”
A couple of girls wearing Greek letter t-shirts were laughing as they slid past our table. Their eyes settled on Parker and grudgingly I had to admit that even though he was an asshole of historic proportions he was even better looking than he’d been in high school. Light brown hair, a deep tan, the kind of sculpted profile that often graced movie screens. The girls moved on when Parker failed to exhibit any interest in them.
I sighed and took a sip of coffee. “So what have you been up to all this time? College? Military? Prison?”
He shook his head. “None of the above. I moved to Nebraska for a while. My uncle has a cattle ranch there and I was working for him. I just moved back here a few months ago.”
“Nebraska?” I tried to picture suave Parker Neely among cowboys and cornfields. The image wouldn’t quite come together.
He nodded. “Yeah. I needed to get out of here so when my uncle made the offer I jumped at it.” He paused and his shoulders wilted. “I don’t know if you heard but my mom died a few months after high school graduation.’
I hadn’t heard, probably because I was having my own problems at the time and would have avoided all news of Parker Neely. “I didn’t know. I’m sorry to hear it.”
“Aneurysm,” he explained, crumpling up a napkin in his fist. “Happened out of nowhere. My dad and I were at each other’s throats and I wanted to start over in a place where I wouldn’t run into anyone from here. My mom had been so disappointed in me after the video bullshit. I guess I wanted to become someone she would have been proud to call her son.”
I didn’t know what the hell to say so I took a sip of coffee. It was hard for me to feel sorry for Parker after everything he’d put me through. At the same time, I wouldn’t have wished that kind of loss on anyone and he sounded sincere.
“You want anything to eat?” he asked suddenly. “They have
sandwiches here. And their lemon scones are out of this world.”
I checked the wall clock. Freya was probably wondering when in the hell I’d return so she’d be free to take lunch. “No. I can’t stay.”
“Maybe another time,” he said and I didn’t miss the hopeful note in his voice.
I stood up. “One question. How’d you really know I was working at Scratch?”
He shifted in his chair and averted his eyes. “I wasn’t stalking you, I swear.”
“If you say so.”
“I knew your dad was the owner so I figured it was a good place to start.”
“I see.” I set my purse strap on my shoulder. I was still mulling over whether I meant the words that were about to come out of my mouth.
“Hey, Parker?”
He raised an eyebrow.
“There’s no need for you to drop the class, all right?”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.”
He looked so thrilled you’d think I had just agreed to run off to Cabo with him. “Thank you, Cassie.”
I pushed my chair back to the table. “It’s nothing.”
“I promise not to chase you into anymore bike racks,” Parker joked.
I snorted. “And I promise I’ll no longer wish for you to contract an intestinal parasite.”
“Intestinal parasite?”
“Yes. Or something equally disgusting.”
He smiled at me. I resisted for a second and then I smiled back. I felt lighter, unburdened. This had been the right thing to do. The right thing for me. And if Parker was able to come to terms with his past misdeeds and find some inner peace of his own, was that really a bad thing?
As I left Parker sitting there at the table I was still smiling.
Then I stopped abruptly because someone was standing on the other side of the glass doors of the coffee shop and silently observing.
His expression could be categorized as halfway between surprise and disgust. He knew nothing about the situation between Parker and me because I hadn’t given him any details.